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Friday, 17 September 2010

This Is MY Time... Bliss!

As always, this time of year is a space where I'm adjusting to season changes, creating more new projects and activities to start and generally getting excited about the new stage that is Autumn/Winter.

One pattern that seems to show up many times is that of being alone. Not in a boo-hoo sad way lol. But in the way that sometimes when you want to expand your comfort zone and do more things to nurture your Self journey, sometimes it's natural that most of your friends aren't interested in joining you or that everyone is so busy building their lives too that you can't stop doing things because friend X, Y and Z can't make it. There comes a point where you know you can't wait for others to do what you want in your life. Sounds obvious but in practice, it can be scary!

I was having a chat with a friend who found her Self in this stage and it was completely new to her. And she told me that she now realised that she always waited for others or she would rather spend it with people she didn't always "vibe" with, just so she didn't have to be alone to do things. She just felt that being alone in certain public spaces (like eating at a nice restaurant etc) was just not something to do alone.

I can see where she is coming from - I did often get periods of time when I had many people around me and then for reasons such as new changes, I or people moving away etc, I find my Self starting out again... alone. And then getting used to it... which makes Self feel vulnerable at times. Open, with no distractions. What a strange feeling it can be when you're used to having so many things to focus on.

And the funny thing is, it's not always because there are no physical people present - but because now we live in a time where it is second nature to always be communicating/interacting with familiar others (facebook, blogging, mobile phones etc). It feels weird at first to just shut it out and get comfy with just being.  It seems like a million years ago now that I was walking around with no mobile phone, no internet at home and being in a stsate of isolation from others in simple daily life (like walking down the street with no mobile phone) as a normal part of life lol!

Not feeling the need to always be connected!

Or maybe that's just me feeling that way lol!?!

And some people are natural loners who enjoy that freedom always! A recent example: I have one client who I see often and she celebrates the fact that she had always enjoyed space alone - she is completely successful in her job as a lawyer, has a great family and relationship. She just feels that her natural state is to be alone. And it's great to see that some people really embrace it and see the positive side of it - which is rare as most times it's almost programmed that you are a "loser" for being alone. This lady is most certainly not one!

I find it a vital part of my life now. And I do LOVE it. I have great friends, family and SO - but I know that time to explore Self alone is very important! And they know that too, which can be a challenge if I'm honest. It helps me to push my boundaries and stay in tune. Time to learn new things, try out new classes, enjoy new food etc. It often also gives a new space for things to enter your life - like a quote from  my favourite book says, "nature always likes to fill up vacuum spaces". It opens up the door to so many great experiences! Yeah lol!

I found this lovely cute video that celebrates being alone... 


So, please share!
What do you feel about being/doing things alone?
When was the last time you treated your Self to a space alone (eating out, dancing etc)?
Do you make time for it? Or do you find it a challenge?
All ideas/comments welcome!

5 comments:

Zayna Daze said...

This is a lovely post! I really like the video. I've always felt like a natural loner myself, yet I enjoy every minute of it.

Aisha said...

I've gotten used to doing things alone, since many times I can't find anyone who is interested in doing the same things. I've gotten used to it, but sometimes it sucks.

I prefer the company of another person when going places in public, unless it's something like going to a bookstore. I get lost! Lol

Ztorus said...

Good for you! I LOVE my alone time as well. I can stop thinking about hubby, children, work, and school without getting that guilty feeling. Not only does time alone calm my senses, but it's when I am most creative.

COCOA said...

THANK YOU for this post. I needed it!

Kristina said...

I am new to your blog and want to read it allll....great post. I love to be alone. I do not wait on no one to do anything....I pretty much like it.
Me Myself and I.
Funnily enough I went to the MBS show this year with a friend (I normally go by myself) and it was not the same.
I like to be with me!
Namaste

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